Pink did not say anything then, but after school, she gave the girl a Power point Presentation about many androgynous artistes and their works, such as Freddy Mercury, Elton John, George Michael, and Lady Gaga and so on. And in the end she also told about herself. She said that often people criticized her too about her not –so –feminine looks and her short boyish hair and clothes. But that did not make her change her appearance, style or attitude. She still continued to be herself and create wonderful music that everyone loved. So what was important was to feel beautiful from inside. One need not change oneself to suit others but one needs to continue being what one believes in. Pink could explain all this to her daughter as she could talk and raise her doubts. But many times, this imitation to please others starts at an early age in children. Children observe their parents and their reactions very closely. Once they understand what kind of behaviour is rewarded with positive reinforcements, they try to repeat the same. Similar is the case with their attitudes. Children’s attitude depends on the parents’ responses in their early lives.
But, honestly speaking, there are always exceptions to all universal rules. So in this case too, many times, parents do feel that their own child is not beautiful, good-looking or presentable. And it is then that the thought is reflected through one’s actions subconsciously in daily encounters with the children. Some parents can’t stop their angst and even compare and appreciate other children in front of their own children for their physical looks/features. Children being great observers pick these hints through their parents’ actions and start feeling low about their physical appearances. At times there can be a rebellious reaction too from the children. Children may want to prove their worth and seek attention of the parents through all kinds of destructive/loud/violent acts.
Children will feel comfortable about their physical appearances if you make them feel so. You need to cuddle them, hug them, love them and especially listen to them peacefully whenever you can. Comfortable physical spaces make it easier for children to accept their personalities. And loving physical actions such as hugging, kissing, patting, handshakes make children feel secure, comforted and loved. You need to think from the perspective of a 3 year old or a 5 year old child for whom YOU are the world. S/he sees your image in every other human being in the world.